http://nowiunderstandwhyithadtohappen.com

Copyright © 2012. Patrick Neo Mabiletsa.

        All rights reserved.

 

VALUE OF FRIENDS – OPINION PIECE 5

Have you noticed how many friends we lose along the way due to distance, level of education, lifestyle change and even different view of life? I have lost friends along the way not only because I moved from the town I grew up on, but merely because of change in values, responsibilities as well as in priorities.

I have lost a best friend from high school simply because he chose to drink every moment he gets and get as many girl friends as he can get, the other one chose to go a different route and not be himself anymore. How can we value people one day and the next day they are gone? And how can it be so easy to let go?

I had/have a friend whom I valued dearly, we used to be so close it was amazing, it was like we were brothers, you see us together we were unbreakable, our families knew that we were best of friends (Bffs) until I could not fulfil his needs anymore. When he did not have a job I used to give him money when he asked but when I could not supply anymore he was nowhere to be found.

The main thing I want to highlight is this, how do we learn to make friendships that will last forever without the other person thinking I will benefit from this friendship. Are the words “there is no such thing as an un-selfish act” true? Can we as people be able to be-friend someone whom we are not going to gain anything material wise? Can we manage to be a friend to someone who needs it instead of someone whom we can benefit from.

I have observed that true friends and them that stay longer in the friendship are those that tell the truth always. A true friend tells the truth at all time, to solidify the friendship there needs to be certain goals that friends have that can connect with one another. For instance, my friend wanted to be a Pastor, I also want to be a Pastor one day, we did not know that when we first became friends, but what has kept us together all these years is because we have the same goal and same vision in life.

Can we really be-friend someone we do not share any value with or any dream? Yes I believe we can, because no matter how the dictionary describes the “friendship”, for me that word means “available”, it means to communicate often, to feel one another’s pain and to know when the other is hurting and be able to find words of comfort for them, to be able to encourage and support the other person, to be able to win the favour of the other without having to work hard for it. Basically to be able to feel loved and safe in their presence.

To be able to know when they are bothered, troubled or feel discouraged, a friend is someone who does not necessarily have to be there always, but have to be there in hard times and in good times. When I think about my success, I put my friend in the picture, I dream together with him because I know him and me have the common goal.

I value my friendships simply because they took long to develop, they took hard work and sacrifice, they are earned, and the respect we build with my friends can never be overpowered by a single change of situation or argument, we apologise to each other when we do hurt each other, we laugh at each other, make fun of each other, it is okay. But how much we value each other’s friendship reflects on how we treat each other.

Now I Understand

Why It Had To Happen

How Life Would Be If We Were To Give Up

Patrick Neo Mabiletsa

Copyright © 2012 by Patrick Neo Mabiletsa.

Library of Congress Control Number: 2011903189

ISBN: Hardcover 978-1-4568-7774-3

Softcover 978-1-4568-7773-6

Ebook 978-1-4568-7775-0

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any

form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording,

or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing

from the copyright owner.

This book was printed in the United States of America.

To order additional copies of this book, contact:

Xlibris Corporation

0-800-644-6988

www.xlibrispublishing.co.uk

[email protected]

PRESS RELEASE

RADIO INTERVIEW: 90.7 RAINBOW FM

DATE: 11 FEBRUARY 2014 - TUESDAY

TIME: 21:00pm

BOOK TITLE: Book For Now I Understand Why It Had To Happen

1. What inspired you to write this book?

I always grew up thinking that I was different, and I basically spend the rest of my life asking myself what was different with me. Until one day I realized that there had to be a reason why I was being faced with so much adversity after another, and why there seems to be more happiness in the lives of my peers and mine was like a mine-field. Until I woke up one morning and decided to embrace my situation by writing it down, and that’s when an inspiration hit to write about what I feel and what I go through and do it in a form of a book.

2. Summarize your book in one to three sentences as if you were speaking to someone unfamiliar with your book and its topic.

Life changing story that talks about a life of a young Christian man, who since childhood has faced trials and tribulations that could have destroyed him if he didn’t have a strong mother. Raised by a single mother, life was a bit hard with finances and the stresses of life. But through it all, he made it because he had a mentality of never giving up.

3. What is the overall theme (central topic, subject or concept) of your book?

The concept of the book is about “how life would be if we were to give up”.

4. Where does this book take place?

It starts in a small remove village called Jericho in a town of Brits and ends up in a big city of Johannesburg, South Africa.

5. Who are the main characters and why are they important to the story?

There are four main characters, because every time they are mentioned, the story changes. Neo, Louisah (Neos Mother), Nonhlanhla (Late Wife) and Bongiwe (Current Wife)

6. Why do you think that this book will appeal to readers?

Because it is filled with all kinds of emotions, its funny, its sad, and very inspiring. It can make you cry but also can make you laugh and will also get you inspired to want to continue in life and never quit.

7. How is your book relevant in today’s society?

This is especially for young people who think that opportunities come to them and if they do not come then life is over, and because they are disadvantaged they can easily give up, and also that when things seem to not be working at a time, it does not mean life can never workout.

8. Is there any subject currently trending in the news that relates to your book?

I hear all the time of young men and woman who have ended their lives because they could not get a job or were facing difficult challenges.

9. What makes your book different from other books like it?

It’s got the original flavor that says, I am strong inside but I did not know it until later.

10. What do you want readers to take away from your writing?

Life is difficult, but what you take out of it can either break you or make you successful.

11. How did you learn about the topic? (i.e. personal experience, education, etc.)

Personal experience

12. Is there a particular passage from your book you’d like us to utilize? If so, please provide.

You can think or imagine life without challenges, but how do you know you are strong if you haven’t really gone through tough times, there is a phrase one man used that says “tough times do not last, but tough people do”.

IF YOU BELIEVE, SHE BELIEVES

I have often wondered what life had or has for me, and I have sometimes asked myself too many questions. Whether I am man enough or even whether I can take care of my wife and whether she does not have to work. Can I be able to provide for her and make her feel the warmth and the love she needs.

I sometimes scream on my own when there are things that I cannot give to her, and I wonder what she is feeling inside about me or what she thinks of me as a man. I put all these pressure on myself, I stress to a point where I get sick. With all these question breaking me down and making me feel useless and make me feel I just want to quit my job.

But let’s face it, a woman in Love does not really care what the husband has or does not have, a woman in love will say I can stand by my husband anytime and anyday when he needs me. A man has to work and be a provider, but if the needs are too much for him, he stresses and get depressed even, because he feels inadequate. He feels that when his wife is not smiling it’s because of him; he feels that when there is no food in the house it’s because of him, he feels the need to even take his own life to end his partners’ misery.

A man starts comparing himself with other men who look like they are doing well providing for their families, a man starts feeling jealous of what other man are doing in their families and what they have achieved. That frustration grows and is planted and engraved onto his mind. He starts to withdraw from many things, and he starts to get frustrated with himself. It takes a strong man to stand up and get up from that situation, it also requires wisdom to handle.

I am saying it requires wisdom because I have seen few man look for jobs far away from home in order to be able to get out of financial difficulties, they eventually manage to and even afford to give their families everything they need, except, it takes them or cost them to spend more time with their families and be close to their children.

So, is it really worth it? When you say I will do anything for my wife, do you mean, try to make it work and fight to get things better while you are with your family or move away to get a job far away where you only see your family once a month?

I have since realised that all the time man spend stressing, if they had given themselves time to see or listen to what their wives are going through, they would’ve solved the problem long time ago, the more a man gets stressed the less chance he gets to think of a solution. But asking the wife what she is thinking instead of assuming she is thinking bad thoughts would actually help.

A man felt small and useless for a very long time and the wife was always pushing him away and always sad and always crying alone in the corner, and he thought it was him, he thought for sure my wife does not love me anymore because I am not a real provider therefore not a real man, only in the end to find out that the wife is desperately praying for him to come back to her and not push her away, she longed for him to stop worrying and just hold her and tell her things will be okay, she wanted to tell him things will workout and that even though she can see he is facing a difficult time, she respects him for what he does.

This is for both man and woman, lets stop having guessing what the other is thinking, its better to ask than to assume “she” or “he” hates me. Whatever you think of yourself, you start believing and it stops you from experiencing the power that is within you, because I personally know that if you have the ability, but do not know, then you are definitely useless. Pick yourself up man and stop stressing, time waits for no man, while you sit and cry, your wife is loosing the faith and giving up, you don’t want that, get into a battle field and show your wife what you can do, because she is staying with you because she knows you can take her out of any situation and protect her.

To the wife, keep praying for him and support him, because if you believe he is Superman, he will show you that he can fly off the building, and if you show him that no matter what, you still love him and care about him, he will definitely rise up to the occasion.

I know, I am a man, I have felt all these emotions before, my wife got me out by believing I can do it. She called me Tarzan and I jumped up and moved trees infront of us. Today we can see the light.

The great company to work for??? Company of 2013 for me personally. Joani Van Vuuren Property Law & Conveyancing Paralegal Leeuwer Maritz Attorneys

Regards,

Patrick

COMPLIMENT – AWESOME/EXCELLENT SERVICE

by neomabiletsa1

COMPLIMENT – AWESOME/EXCELLENT SERVICE

Joani Van Vuuren Property Law & Conveyancing Paralegal Leeuwer Maritz Attorneys

Do you know that sometimes we can help people not expecting anything in return, and we can end up being blessed ourselves?

I had a best experience with attorneys recently (Listed Above) and it has been the awesome experience of my life. And the reason I am so excited about their speedy, robust and flexible service is that I have always seen attorneys as dishonest and only after money, and only concerned about what they are getting from whomever the come-across.

But with this company I have had the best service, from emailing them and receiving a response back in less than 5 minutes, to receiving a personal attention and professional update on everything they are doing. To explaining their (LAW) Jargon slow and patiently to me.

They have been dealing with my home registration process and they have been efficient as to go an extra-mile as to find me a new home to stay with my family. Normally attorneys would just leave you to make your own arrangements, which I expected here, but have been blown away. I have to give a personal thank you to Joani Van Vuuren whom has been responding my messages personally, I am sure she has a lot to do, but I felt like a special client even though I know she has many more...

I feel like a king right now, and I hope they continue with their service at all times to please and to excel, this is the kind of company I would like to see receive recognition and go further than South Africa, this company deserves International Recognition.

Thank you to all the staff and especially Joani Van Vuuren.

Regards,

Patrick Neo Mabiletsa

I AM IN PAIN FOR YOU (Jesus)

I am in pain for you; I am again and again in pain for you

I am Jesus the one you are crucifying,

Remember I was bruised, beaten and ridiculed,

I never gave up, because of the pain I feel for you,

I remember you every day, all day and all night,

When I was dragged in chains through the city,

When some laughed and some felt the pity

When I was slapped, smacked and jacked

I only held on because although I was in pain,

I thought of how you would be disappointed if i did not finish the race,

I am in pain,

Can you see the pain in my eyes? Can you feel the strain in my shoulders?

The shoulders are bleeding as I carry through the city the cross,

How can I not do it for you, even when God suffered a great loss?

He knows, I Know you know that it had to be done for you,

Imagine the big chains in my hands,

Imagine the heaviness of the cross in my shoulders,

Imagine the heat, the whipping and the smothering I got,

It was painful, it was tough, but because I love you,

It would have been more painful to just stand there and not give myself,

I am in pain when you keep sinning and do not come back to me

I am in pain, I am in pain,

This pain is too much, but my love is more than the pain,

Now I Understand Why It Had To Happen: How Life Would Be If We Were To Give Up by Patrick Neo Mabiletsa

“No. Don’t give up hope just yet. It’s the last thing to do. When you have lost hope, you have lost everything. And when you think all is lost, when all is dire and bleak, there is always hope.”

― Pittacus Lore, I Am Number Four

His life is a one big, exciting roller coaster ride. He had been through ups and downs. There were too many obstacles on his path that threatened to bring him down. His was a difficult journey, but he never stopped until he reached where he wanted to be.

He was born on Wednesday of June 10, and he was given the name, Neo, which means “gift”. His mother believed he is a gift from God.

Louisa, his mother, had to leave him and his older brother home in order to work, and she could only go home once a month. It was hard for them. Despite that, they lived happily, thriving on the simple things and making do of what they got.

As he grew up, he started to notice some things that are missing in his life. The most insistent question on his mind was the desire to know why he’s the only one among his friends who doesn’t have a father. His mother found it hard to answer, and since he knew how painful it was for her, he compromised to just let things be.

He had dreams, and his top priority was to get his family out of poverty. For a moment, he seemed to have everything as planned. He enrolled in a university with the help of a pastor. It was short-lived, but the disappointment he felt that time led him to a different path. Indeed, God knows what’s best for each and everyone.

At every turn, he had to make a choice, and every choice had a profound effect on his life. He came across too many points in which he lost hope; he lacked the will to fight. But he never gave up. He never let anything defeat him. He did not let go, instead, he held on.

Every choice he made molded him to who and where he is right now.

Patrick Neo Mabiletsa shares his heartwarming story in an inspiring memoir, Now I Understand Why It Had To Happen. He let the readers see the difference had he given up.